How to say I love you in Vietnamese

In a couple, the man is anh and the woman is em. So he says anh yêu em, literally older-brother loves younger-one, and she says em yêu anh. The pairing usually holds even when the woman is a little older. For many couples, starting to use anh and em is part of becoming a couple.

Same-sex couples usually go by age: the older partner is anh (or chị, between two women) and the younger is em.

You can also drop the pronouns. Yêu em on its own is like love you in English: lighter, quicker, and very common at the end of a phone call.

Thương is the word many Vietnamese say runs deeper than yêu. It's love with care and tenderness in it, the love parents have for their children, or what you feel for someone you'd look after. It can also mean pity or compassion, which tells you something about its flavour.

In the South, anh thương em is an everyday I love you between couples, and you'll hear it in countless songs. In the North, yêu is the usual word between partners, and thương can sound especially tender. Both are understood everywhere, and both are a real I love you.

Many Vietnamese couples save yêu for when things are serious. Before that there's a ladder: thích (to like), có cảm tình (to have feelings), nhớ (to miss). Saying anh nhớ em after a few dates is sweet. Saying anh yêu em on the second date can feel like too much, too soon.

Nhớ is especially useful. It means both to remember and to miss, and couples use it constantly, often several times a day.

When anh yêu em isn't enough, Vietnamese goes big. Love songs here are not shy, and lines that sound over the top in English can sound sincere in Vietnamese. Still, the bigger the line, the more it belongs in private or in a message, not across a busy restaurant table.

Tone matters as much as the words. Said quietly, with eye contact, anh không thể sống thiếu em is moving. Said with a grin when she hands you an iced coffee on a hot afternoon, it's a joke you'll both enjoy. Same words, different message, and Vietnamese speakers switch between the two all the time.

In messages, yêu often becomes iu, which looks and feels cuter. Nhiều (a lot) becomes nhìu, and extra letters add feeling: iuuu. These spellings are playful and perfect with a partner, but keep them out of anything formal. Our list of texting abbreviations covers the rest of the shorthand.

The simple reply is em cũng yêu anh or anh cũng yêu em: I love you too. Cũng means also, and it does all the work.

If someone says it too early, or too dramatically, a laughing sến quá (so cheesy) teases without saying no. And if you're not there yet, say so kindly. A gentle để em suy nghĩ đã is much better than an I love you you don't mean.

With your parents, you are con (child), and they are bố and mẹ in the North, ba and má (or mẹ) in the South. In many Vietnamese families, especially older generations, love is shown more than said: through food, worry, and questions like ăn cơm chưa? (have you eaten yet?). Saying it out loud can still touch people deeply, especially from a child who lives far away.

Between friends, yêu sounds romantic. Use quý (to be fond of, to value) instead.